I don't know if I continue , even today , always liking myself . But what I learned to do many years ago was to forgive myself . It is very important for every human being to forgive herself or himself because if you live , you will make mistakes - it is inevitable . But once you do and you see the mistake , then you forgive yourself and say , 'well, if I'd known better I'd have done better,' that's all . So you say to people who you think you may have injured , 'I'm sorry,' and then you say to yourself , 'I'm sorry.' If we all hold on to the mistake , we can't see our own glory in the mirror because we have the mistake between our faces and the mirror , we can't see what we're capable of being . You can ask forgiveness of others , but in the end the real forgiveness is in one's own self . I think that young men and women are so caught by the way they see themselves . Now mind you . When a larger society sees them as unattractive , as threats , as too black or too white or too poor or too fat or too thin or too sexual or too asexual , that's rough. But you can overcome that . The real difficulty is to overcome how you think about yourself. If we don't have that we never grow , we never learn, and sure as hell we should never teach .

Tupai is the Malay word for squirrel :) .

I just got my new cell phone but I want to switch all the stuff from my old one to my new one like photos music and contact . However I cant just switch Sim Cards -.- . How ? Anyone please ? Yesterday , 21 August 2010 . Breaking Fast with 5 amanah and Puan Rozita at Restaurant Tupai Tupai BUT I prefer to say " SUGAR GLIDER RESTAURANT " . HEHEHE . Had a great time with them . Should I comment about the place or food ? Mayb Both :) . The place just like a unique Malaya house and serving Malay cuisine but no steamboat yesterday -.- . Decorated restaurant definitely a place to relax and hang around while enjoying the food . So I think , yesterday buffet Ramadhan was Okay .

This is endless.

I swear I miss you more and more every single day. I used to think that you and I were going to make it through anything, and now I know that is the farthest thing from true. You’re with her now, and it kills me to see you two so fucking happy. I hate how you love her now. I want to be that for you, so much.I hoped that this summer I could’ve prove to you that I would honestly always be there in friendship, and more than that if you wanted it. I succeeded in being your friend, but I think we’ve realized that I will never be anything more again. I wish it wasn’t like that.I don’t want you to ever forget me, because I know I won’t forget you. I still wish for everything we had, and that it could be the way it was, even though I know that will never happen. For once, please hear me out, and listen to the words I am saying to you. You are the most important thing in this world to me.I know I deserve better… but I don’t want anyone else.

- From : Tumblr :) -

Prom Night

Any idea where to buy a very eye-catching prom dress , I prefer it in LONG and satin material , something look classy yet not that tremendously . I can guarantee that I only wear this dress only once for a dinner prom . HEHE . BUT my lovely mother says I'm old-fashioned . Obviously , as her daughter , I think she's the old . hahaha , Joking :) . Begin your search for your prom dress early .

SBU + VI Prom Night . I'm going both :DD .

R O J A K :)

Alhamdulilah , Hari ini hari yang ketiga berpuasa di bulan ramadhan :) . Semuanya berjalan dengan lancar , and blm lagi dapat cuti drpd ALLAH . Jadi , alhamdulilah lah . Semalam , jumpa sayang kejap . lepas Kelas tmbhan account , sayang amik kat sekolah and terus balik rumah . Sayang naik kejap utk jumpa dgn ayah . Then dia terus balik -________- . Tak apa , Sekurang kurangnya dapat jumpa dia juga drpd tak dpt . Hari ni dah hari jumaat , kalau tak silap lagi 102 hari untuk SPM :O . Hari ini , P&P pun tak ada lah stress sangat . Pagi tadi belajar account , sebab account je lagi 2 bab tak habis . yang lain Alhamdulilah dah habis . and minggu depan terus ada bengkel . Lepas account tadi , ERT . Tapi ERT cikgu tak ada . So , duduk dlm kelas and buat kerja sendiri . Lepas tu ada Bengkel Sejarah kat bilik pameran lepas tu balik :) . Insyallah , kalau tak ada pape halangan , ahad ini pergi UM ada Seminar Sejarah juga . Kalau boleh nak ajak sayang sekali . tapi nampaknya dia tak boleh , sebab dia balik kampung . Jadi , tak boleh nk buat apa lah . Isnin ni pula :) . HEHEHEHE , Happy Birthday Munie :D !

I'm missing you and It's killing me .

I may not get to see you as often as I like . I may not get to hold you in my arms all through the night . But deep in my heart I truly know, you are the one that I love , and I can't let you go . Distance never separates two hearts that really care , for our memories span the miles and in seconds we are there . But whenever I start feeling sad , because I miss you , I remind myself how lucky I am to have someone so special to miss . Missing you gets easier everyday because even though I'm one day further from the last time I saw you , I'm just one day closer to the next time I will see you again . Whatever it takes , you know I will be right here , right here , always waiting for you . If ever there is tomorrow when we are not together . There is something you must always remember. . . you are braver than you believe , stronger than you seem , and smarter than you think . But the most important thing is , even if we are apart , I will always be with you . Just remember the distance between our hearts is not an obstacle rather a great reminder of just how strong true love can be . Sometimes I think to myself how you happen to make me smile after all you have put me through .

All I need is you needing me.

I don’t honestly know who to put half of this into words , but I will string it
together as best as possible . It’s like you don’t care anymore, sometimes like you never did . I want to scream at you and tell you everything I have ever held back from saying but where would it really get me . You’d pretend I never said it , you’d pretend that was I was wrong and that it was all just lies . The truth is , you make me feel like I’m the biggest piece of filth you’ve ever seen . Like I’m constantly in the way and that I was never wanted . You make me feel like no one could ever love me and that I don’t deserve anything in life . You undermine me and take everything out on me . You blame me for things that no human could preven t. You pressure me to be perfect and make me feel like the biggest disappointment you have ever seen . You don’t ever comfort me in the slighest . You make me feel as though you are ashamed to even know me . I don’t know how much longer I can do this . I tried .

Preparation for Ramadhan .

Alhamdulillah the month of Ramadhan has dawned upon us once again . It should be remembered that what we practice is what we will take into the month of Ramdhan . I miss when Dinner table is filled with interesting food such as cakes , desserts , sweet drinks and home-cooked , Something that cannot be seen during normal day . During a month old Ramadhan will be the setting-up of hundreds of stalls everywhere selling all kinds of foods . This is the main reason why I cant wait for Ramadhan :) .

August .

6 - 7 August = Qiamullail at Seri bintang Utara .
7 August = Victoria Institution International Understanding Night & Installation 201
11 August = Happy Fasting Month ( Muslims )
16 August = Happy Birthday Munie :)

August Already ,

Saturday , 31 July .
Woke up & got ready while waiting for sayang to fetch us . Sayang reached around 11.45 and straight away went to pavilion . It was shitloads of fun cause we got to talk a lot & watched movie . We watched Eclipse :) . I cared about the characters . The movie had heart like so much T_T . Rosalie’s back story was perfectly played out . Edward you are cute but not cuter than Jacob :D . Deal with it . The next movie I cant wait better be the best I ever had . I can not wait for Breaking Dawn to come out I just buzzing about it and it better ends here . But Before we watched movie , We had a lunch at Food court with Mom , Alang , Ahbie , Riel and nurul . Our movie at 2.40 and finished at 4.50 almost 5 thereeee . Called mom , and met her at second floor . It was nice catching up :) . and then Starbucks . Then went home . No I mean , before that We went to jusco maluri . Went home and there was nothing to eat :S . BUT , I really had a great time with my family & sayang :) . Today , I woke up at 11.30 am . Watched TV while texting sayang .