I'm afraid to take the next step in my life

Apologies to all my blogger friends who kept checking and found nothing new for a long time . It was a fulfilling day and I'm dead tired man . Sorry for the late post , guys . BTW , Last Wednesday , I went to irsyad's place . BBQ party . I really had fun with them , especially in the car with nabil , farhan power , dann and arif . Thank you to aziem coz he pick me up at home with alia and drop me at VI . Enough with BBQ . and now moving on , I just got back from office and I'm damn TIRED . BUT . . . I really cant wait for my first salary . HEHEHE . Today is 27 December , And I guess this will be my last post for the year . Well , another year gone :) . It feels like yesterday it was the first of January 2010 . So goodbye 2010 , can't say I will miss you much :PP . New Chapter for my diary and blogger . BTW , I'm working at BOSS as a general clerk and store clerk . & I'm happy with my job act :) . Currently , chatting with aziem . He's my fav boy :) . Sometimes He SOOOO Annoying . Bitch slap KANG !BUT , the thing is , he was there when I need someone else . Tapi kadang kadang macam palat sikit -_- . Okay , I really GTG now . On Air - twitter & Tumblr ♥ BOI . and Happy New year everyone . I love you , followers . May Allah bless us .

Which is sad .

I know its been a long time since I have written anything . Its so weird being back . So I haven't posted in about a week . Well nothing particularly exciting has happened . I cannot express how wonderfully grateful I am to have a boyfriend like Syad . He is absolutely perfect to me . I truly enjoy the time I get to spend with him . Irsyad and I really had a good weekend . Last friday we went out to Pavilion KL . He's fetch me at home around 3pm and our movie at 4.30 . We watched NARNIA . I really like this movie since the first chapter . I really agree with mom which this movie has a great story . The details are fuzzy enough so I can really appreciate the film . This time chapter has a lots of action scenes and impressive special effects . But Syad , didn't like the movie much I thought it was entertaining . So overall , I really enjoy this movie . Before we watched movie , we went to food court and had our lunch . Its our day , just me and syad . AHHHH , I miss him a lot ,man :( . After movie we went to KFC and met Nabil . Around 7pm , We straight away to Sungai wang . Okay , guess what . Sayang , bought STICKY for me :D . I'm so happy when he said " Okay okay , jom kita pergi beli sticky " . Awwww , baby :') . hehehehe . Moving on , The next day we met again . But we only went to Jusco with mom and ah bie . Today is 13 December :D , and guess what ! I'M FREE NOW . YEAH YEAH ! likee , so legaa now . It makes my heart and body temperature happy . LOL :P . And now , I'm waiting for this Wednesday . BBQ at irsyad's place . Peace yaw !

End of story

Believe it or not , I hate drama . I know that sayang will upset with my previous posts and I know , from the previous posts I will make him sad and he will think that he's dont know how to take care of me . BUT actually , you really good sayang . Just , sometimes I dont like the way she copying me . I dont want to talk about this actually but to make it short and simple . I would like to apologize to " you " . I have learnt from sayang " Even though its not your fault BUT you still have to apologize " . So right now , I'm sorry for everything that I have done to you , girl . And I'm sorry for the pain . Okay , Thats it . Moving on , I just done with my maghrib prayer and after isyak prayer I'm going back to cemetery . Tomorrow is the last day . And May his soul rest in peace . Tahu tak , aku rasa bertuah sangat sebab dapat kau , irsyad ? Tahu tak ? Okay , kalau kau tak tahu biar aku bagitahu . Sebabkan kau , pandai jaga girlfriend kau . Kau halang aku , bila aku buat sesuatu perkara yang tak mendatangkan kebaikan . Kau tak kan biar aku terjerumus . B , mana ada lelaki yang buat mcm tu . Mana ada lelaki , yang paham and pandai pujuk hati perempuan . Sebabkan kau ,kau banyak ajar aku cara untuk bersabar dan tawakal kepada Allah . Kita sebagai manusia , hanya mampu bersabar dan tunggu apa yang jadi . Hanya Allah , yang akan menurunkan bala kepada dia . Aku beralah sebab aku tak nak semua ibadat aku hilang begitu sahaja . Jadi harap " kau " jangan salah paham . Whatever it is , I'm so proud to be yours , syad ! And Alhamdulilah , We are still going strong . Syad , I miss fighting with you :( . I'm just no good without you , Remember that . One months almost 1333 message and one day we texted almost over 150 . Our power love :D . LOL . xoxo , I love you SYAD ! eeee , geram !

Its you .

Like seriously , girl . I though I was wrong but seems like everyone said that you are trying to be like me . Then , I'm so fucking agree with them . YES ! I do mention that I wont talk or blogger about you , but I think I should , sorry followers ! Why not if you ask yourself first ? Before you do anything , can you think twice ? FIKIR apa yang akan jadi . Kau dah tahu , yang ramai cakap kau copycats tapi still nak buat juga . Fine lah , kalau kau baca blogger aku . tapi tak payah lah sampai nak meniru . Nak cakap aku perasan , Tak mungkin . semua orang nampak smua tu . tak kan lah semua benda " KEBETULAN " . Mula mula tiru , about me , words and now blogspot . OMG , Gila low standard . Sumpah , kesian gila . Dapat boyf yang ada class tapi gf low standard . Sorry , kalau mulut aku hari ni agak kurang ajar . But the thing is , I cant stand it ! When someone asks her why she's copying me , she pretends that she has no idea what they are talking about , then makes up a stupid exscuse . I'm tired , FULLSTOP ! I'm tired with your , attitude which everything you want to deny . You see . At first , I really dont give you a SHIT ! Whatever , people talked about you . I said , thats your life . If you wanna be the best try yourself but not this way . I JUST WANT IT TO STOP ? CLEAR , idiot ? Go on with your life . Everyone has their own style . Dont you know that ? You are so dumbbershit ! Its really annoying , bitch . Should I said to you that , PLEASE STOP COPYING ME ? LOL . hahaha . that funny okay . I think she will out grow it . My friends asked me to said " FUCK OFF " and hopefully she will get the message . HAHAHAHA . Seriously , they really made my day today . Last but not lest , Thank you very much for admiring me so much that you want to reflect me . It's quite an honor :) . Never mind girl . I really love you . What goes around comes around .

Because of webcame

I miss this :( . Actually I miss my hair . Baby please baby . I wanna cut my hair :( , so badly :(

Loving you always be the sweetest thing I have ever done ,

Alhamdulilah , I feel so much better now . Thank you for the time , sayang . Eventho tomorrow , physic papers but you still spend your time with me . I'm kinda , selfish for this time =/ . I know BUT I miss you so much :( . You always help me with all the troubles . If I said , no one care about me BUT you always say , you do . I miss all the great times T_T . I hate this feeling & I cant wait for 15 December , which we are free from SPM . So that we can spend our good time with movie , shopping and food . Sunway , I miss you . Actually , I'm just done with my isyak prayer and Science . Be frank , I'm ready for science :) . 4 more papers , Y-E-S ! Make it fast , AGAIN . . . . And now what ! Haihhh , Munie stop thinking about syad just for a minute ? P L E A S E ? But , I want to tell you that I wish you were here . B , tadi papers add math , I TAK DUDUK DIAM ! I risau gila and asyik berdoa je yang you dapat buat . Then , bila semua papers habis , You message I yang you boleh buat . Ya Allah , Lega sangat . Okay , now mommy kacau -.- . She ask me to stop with blogger and continue study with science . Toodles .

One in a Million .

I love that song :D . Okay ! Should I tell you that . . . I'm a BIG fan of Ne-yo ? YES YES , Its true guys . I mean , Its really really true . I like everything about him . He's has a nice tone of a good songs which everyone agree with it . So far , one in a Million is the best song that I ever heard . I love that song because it has a important message about a girl and Its remind me of syad . Really really strong , lyric . Wtvr , it is . You go , Ne-yo . I feel tired . Nothing much has happened , maybe except for today :D . I just got back from Jusco , Maluri with syad . Well , Today is 30 November , Oh-My-God thats mean tomorrow is 1 December :O . Unexpected , Seriously . Like tic-toc-tic-toc , end of November already . I'm done with 5 papers so far and Alhamdulilah I'm so fine with those papers . Agama was awesome , I hope I still can maintain my grade which A's . Dont ask me , whether A plus , A or A minus . As long A's then I'm happy with it :) . Moving on . . . I finished at 12.55 and waited for aqeela , hazirah and Farah . Different Class T_T , OH CRAP ! So , straight away to Guard house and waited for sayang . EEEEEEE Sayang , you pissed me off just now and little bit disappointed :'( BUT I hate to tell you this that you still made my day no matter what . He's called me and said " B , kat mana ? " And I was like " Oh , kat Guard house ? Why " . He said " Hurm , B i'm sorry I tak dpt datang I kena balik now . then I just said " Hurm , alrte nvm b . Tuition penting " and suddenly . . . I SAW HIS CAR , no joke and I was about to scream but control munie , control . *takut salah* Then I tengok number plat dia . HAAA , sah sah boyfriend aku . JKS 3 and honda stream you lain dari yang lain . So , HEHEHEHEHEHEHEH . Masuk je kereta , JERIT puas puas . Fuck ohh , I miss you baddly , B ! I dont know why , but you nampak putih and comel hari ini T_T . Hangpa punya muka hari ni berseri seri . Okay , then we went to Jusco and had our lunch . I saw my friends :D , dylla , wiena and cikpah with gangsss . And now , its 5.30pm and I'm out . Last but not least , Sayang , Good luck for add maths okay ? I know you can do it ! I love you , Syn & I cant wait to eat LAMB :D . omg omg , make it fast please . I'm begging youuuu , day .

It’s bullshit, and you know it.

111 Followers in tumblr , Thank you guys <3 . Good Morning , world . How are you ? I'm doing fine . Currently , with my mom and I'm busy with modern maths =/ . Stomach ache , Nice on . Thank you , food . Yesterday , when I received a card which my friend invited me to a party , I was like " hurm , I dont know " . I will go if you do at your house or restaurant but . . . if PUBS / BAR , the first word that I'm gonna say " Sorry , I'm not going eventho you are my good friends " . You should know that I hate loud noises and I'm also not a person who likes crowds BUT this is a way to tell you that I actually hate going out for clubbing or partying . Okay ? Just like dance on the floor eventho I do love dancing . Ask sayang , Whenever we go out I will dance eventho I look stupid because I never care what people say about me . Let , my loved one know How I am . That's enough for me . I intend to be sociable but there's no need to make a habit of spending my life at clubs , getting wasted every night . I'm fine with my life . So whats the problem if I'm being a quiet person or anti-social . I'm wild but I have limits , guys . Even my mom said that to me , You can go out but there must be a limit time . As long I'm with irsyad , then I should not be worried because she knows that irsyad can take care of me whenever my parents are not around . My parents , do love irsyad . I will be happy as long , my parents , my friends and irsyad with me . That all , I need . I dont need , a diamond or a huge house to make my life better .

The problem here is attitude

I'm free from H-I-S-T-OR-Y . Okay , I'm agree with you guyssss that SEJARAH was like !#$%^&*()!@#%^ BUT , I CAN DO IT :D . HEHEHE . So , I'm not worry about my sejarah . Insyallah dengan izin Allah , tak kan ada pape yang berlaku because I had been through so much abuse by sejarah . LOL . And guys , please dont give up . It's in the past , it has already happened , thats it ! It has nothing to do with it . Remember , failing at some effort does not mean you are a failure . Okay ? Btw , 6 more papers to go :) . Another 2 weeks , then BYEBYE SPM . Meet you in March 2011 , kayh ? Today , 25 November and sayang fetch me at school today *hangpa ni rajin tau* , I finished at 12.30 then waited for him . Oh and Nabil too . I almost forgot about him =/ . So , I decided to had our lunch at Puteri but then Puteri full with people :'( . Went to maiden and ate there . eeee , I'm not your fav customer lah , maiden . I prefer Puteri , but sayang always " love " maiden . Ishhh . Next week Monday , I have maths exam :O . Okay , pray for my success . Be nice to me , maths . Hopefully it works out . Lately , I always wake up at 4.30 am :'( . But dont worry munie , Study for the last exam . After this , you can sleep and have all the fun you need . I'm waiting for you , 13 December :) . Today I watched , no regret and it is a nice drama and I'm out .

imma so happy today

Fist of all , I LOVE KEDAH DARUL AMAN . eyh , betul ke ? Whtvr . Its 5:31 pm . Just got back from school , I'm so fucking done with you , BM :) . So byebye . and you know what , Insyallah I will get A in my BM . tralalala . Ask Allah , if you want to know about it . LOL . Tomorrow , English paper One and two . Bring in on , English . Imma gonna kill you . Last night , I received a lot of message from my friends . OMG OMG , I'm so touched :'( . Thnks to Syn , Vela , Ieka , Allan ,Arif Johan , Ewan , Farah Emmyliya ,Nuqman , Nana , Wiena and blablabla . I'm running out credit , guys =/ . So sorry . Okay , Look like someone are trying to be cool at this time . Hahaha . BOOYA , girl . Move on , Another 2 weeks to go . Come on , munie . You can do it . Iphone4 Iphone4 . Anything for you , munie . Bak kata mama LAH . HEHEHE . bedtimestory , Mira told me that she's so terasa about my blog :O . Whats up ? And I was so shocked when I'm heard it . hahahahha ! We are like " OMG OMG " . You guys pun tahu kan bila perempuans ada gossip mcm mana rupa . hahaha , Bet me boys are so sick with it . Eyh but , dude tu memang dia . So ? And mira asked me " mcm mana dia tahu " . And my friends and I was like . . . " OH OH OH , great news do . I have a stalker XD " . LOL . hahaha . This stalker is very sensitive person . And because of this stalker , My whole love story is miserable . But Alhamdulilah , Nothing bad happened to me and sayang . Haih , whtvr it is . " just let her go and play with her kitten " , LOL . Okay , now Its 6:24 :O . Surprised from sayang . eeeeeeeee , gerammm . *tingtong* Munie : Kak long buka lah pintu . Kak long : Palau . Munie : * pergi pintu , buka* . . . and SCREAMMM ! AAAAAA . Eyh , I forgot to tell you , that I love to scream :D . dont ask me why . I'm not going to answer your question . Syad : Jom , ikut I . and I was like " B , kita nak pg mana " . Repeat the same question like over and over again . and then . . . eeee . I'm lazy to story lah . Right now , mama suruh stop and Pergi mandi + Stdy for The pearl . LOL . Okay , bye . I love you , followers .

How about " Nothing Special " . A faker story .

I dont use your fucking words and I dont speak your fucking language , Clear ?

Its really amazing what some people would do , just to get attention . Got brain but no content inside . Hurm let see here , why not if you just take five min , and think about it . I dont think , five is enough for you . Maybe 1 hours for you . Frankly , you such a loser person . I REPEAT , LOSER PERSON . We see that you are trying so hard to hide everything . LOL . That is a huge mistake , GIRL . Remember , being fake will not get you anywhere . Oh , I know I got class . . . but you ? hurm , pity you , girl . Anyway , people only copy good stuffs :P . So , Thank you girl . I'm awesome . I know that . And yeahh babe , be originality . How sad ! Pissed Off ? HA HA HA , Like I care bitch . Keep up the good work , Good luck with your loser life . I mean fake life . Don’t worry , we all know who is the real one . Never mind , just give her chance . * low standard * . And one more thing , I'm not going to play your fucking game . Alright ? And doesn't mean I'm scared . Just . . . What for babe ? you tell me , girl . Setakat nak mencarut , DAAAAAAA . REMPIT JE GUNA , DERRR . kau rempit ke ? And I dont use , FB for this even my blogspot . Okay ? and dont worry , ni last update aku pasal kau .

Two words , kill me (!)

I'm now reading a book called " New Moon " which is very good . I woke up this morning with a pain in my butt . I have been bothered by a lot lately . I kinda liked yesterday . Even though I wasn’t having the best day , I wasn’t in a bad mood . I felt nothing . I was numb . Even when I told my bestfriend some mistakes and some things that were very awkward and all I didn’t feel regret , awkward nor anger . I just felt nothing and it was nice . I liked not feeling anything not giving a fuck . So let’s face it , I miss Syn :D . LOL .

Honestly, are you in love right now?
- Yes . Because I don't love qualities
but I do love persons :) . LOL

Honestly, what's going on in your mind right now?
- Revision , BM just for karangan .

Honestly, what are you doing right now?
- Hurm , Blogger while tweet-ing .

Honestly, what you did today?
-Woke up at 11 , texted sayang , Waiting for him ,
went to Clinic but we never make it -_- , Lunch
and spend too much time with him .

Honestly, do you think you are attractive?
- Hahaha , I dont think so

Honestly, have you done something bad today?
- No .

Honestly, do you watch disney channel?
-Astro on demand is more
better than disney channel .

Honestly, are you jealous on someone now?
- No . If yes , what for ?

Honestly, what makes you happy all the time?
- Tweet-ing and blogger .
Always be there for me .

Honestly, what do you want to see at this very moment?
- Syn ?

Honestly, do you have a deep dark secret?
- I do and you too :) .

Honestly, do you hate someone right now?
- Sometimes Yes , and sometimes No .

Honestly, what do you wanna hug right now?
-No

Honestly, does anyone like you?
- Syn :')

Honestly, do you answer this question correctly?
- Yes -_-

I'm starting to feel sick

Thursday , 18 November 2010 . Ohmygod , I miss blogger so much :D . I have not made a post for a while . I say that like every time though . I find that I don't have much to say anymore . Like , there is so much crap on my mind constantly but when I actually try to get it out it's quite difficult I find . I'm not happy with any of the posts I produce anymore and everybody kinda pffttt on them =/ . Lately , I'm busy with my study and friends . I only have about 3 days to go before SPM , Cool ha . I find life to be really suckish sometimes . Especially when you have everything but a reason to be so sad and still all you can do is sit there and be . . . sad and mad , and all the other things you don't ever want to be . Hurm , Today I went to Time Square with sayang and friends . We watched Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows , Part 1 . This is one movie in which the natural effects exceed the special kind . The most magical moments of all . Overall , God job . After , done with our movie then straight away to Perpustakaan Kuala Lumpur with Allans . VI's ramai sangat kat sana =/ . Okay wtvr . This blog belong to me and irsyad . Sayang , If I'm not here tomorrow , Please try not to cry and please know that I love you so much . I will keep you in my heart and I will remember you like forever . Every time you think of me I will be here in your heart . Heaven / hell isn't that far . Finally I felt I was as happy as I deserved to be . There are so many things that would remain incomplete . I want to say sorry for everything I did wrong . All the pain that I put you through but I don't want to put you through more pain than you are already in . Thank you for everything that you did right . I don't want you to think you did anything wrong .

Sincerely , Munie .

loved

You are so good to me . You bless me with so many things in my life and I could have never thought it was you . You were there for me when I could never tell anybody anything and you still are . You are my saviour now . You show me that I could still have faith and that I should always believe in you knowing that you will repay every single person who does good in your name . You give me strength , strength knowing that I can live every single day with a smile on my face and a good deed for every person that I come across . You gave me a loving relationship that best mates in the world and the best friends in the whole world . He is the one that I give trust for anything , the one that I pray to every single day , the one that I could trust with a promise made and the one that I could tell all the things on my mind . He is the one that I love until now . Thank you so much for everything . I love you .

I don’t even know where to begin . It seems like no amount of words can describe exactly how I feel about you . Trust me , there’s a reason I put this off for so long. But here goes nothing . School was okay and about my trial . . . everything just fine . Alhamdulilah . But truth to be told , I'm so dead for Account . and MATH too . Oh , FUCK ! Account , can you be nice to me ? like please darlin . BTW , I know I may have made mistakes BUT you should know that life didn't came with instructions :P . Bet me , she's a life-ruiner . She ruins people lives . I got 99 problems from her & they all bitches . I don't want to care . If I care about things , it'll just be worse , it will just be another thing to worry about . It's less painful if I don't care . Thats what my mom & my dad told me . Back to my love story , I'm still with IrsyadSyn like CURRENTLY WITH HIM . okay fullstop . Well , we have been for 6 months 3 weeks and 2 days . Okay lah , Almost seven . HEHEHE . What a nice number , haa . This will sound silly and dumb . I know :P and I'm out .

Mistakes

If I could, I would do so many things differently and I wouldn’t take back anything ,NO . Like , I would let you go anywhere , do anything you want . I would hold my tongue for every snide remark . I would let you sleep a little earlier , eat a little more , talk a little less . I wouldn’t have been so gosh darn selfish . You don’t know what you have until it’s gone , sayang . If I could , I would treat you like the person you deserved to be treated & I wouldn’t be as narrow minded , thinking you should be the person I thought you should be in my mind . I got consumed in what I wanted . I’m sorry . I know you loved me for a whole different person and in a way , I hate what I become :'( . Besides that , There was so many things planned that we didn’t get to do . There are certain days of the month that are more special than any others . I wanted to surprise you and make you happy . I know it may not seem like it , but I really did try . I’m sorry that I’m simply someone that will sit in a corner and collect dust . But you did mean a lot to me , B . Remember that .

Already October . Another 1 months

There isn’t anything I want more in life then to make my mother proud . I want to show her that all her sacrifice and hard work hasn’t been in vain . I want to give her the best present on this planet . I want to be able to invite her to my school graduation . My mother has giving me everything I have ever needed and in return all I want is to make her proud . I know that she works extremely hard to try and save up for me to go to school but I know that it isn’t enough . I know I need a little extra help to give my mother the most significant present in this world . I want to go to college so I can prove everyone wrong that has ever doubted me . I have had to deal with so many changes in my life that have made me into the person I am today . Every single obstacle that has been placed in front of me I have over come . I have made many mistakes in my life that if I had the chance to go back in time to prevent them from happening I still wouldn’t . I wouldn’t because every mistake I made , I have learned from . Every mistake has helped me realize the repercussions of my actions . There came a point in my life where I just wanted to give up . I don’t want to be another statistic out there . I want to be the example of how hard work can make anything possible . I want to be someone in life. I don’t want to end up like so many people out there that just wish they would have done something with their lifes. I want to go to college so that later on when I have a family I will be able to support them . I want to make a name for myself. I don’t want my future children to have to live the way I have . If you do decide to give me a shot at making my dreams come true I can tell you one thing . I will not let you down , mom . I will try my best .

MY DAY

First off I didn’t go to school today cause I dont feel like studying eventho next week I'm having my big exam - T R I A L . What a wonderful moment with you books . Give me some hug . It's 10.52am and Today is Saturday 25 September . Bad day for me because when I'm woke up , my throat on fucking fire . Well , that’s a great start . Later , sayang said that he will pick me up after school . Going to sayang house later :) . Currently , I'm texting him :D . oooolalalala . Can I have MCD for my lunch , sayang ? PWEASE :( . Next week Saturday , Open house Maria & Hareesa . but I dont know whether I can make it or not . Mayb I'm going with Dee Ishak . But , I will try girls . and thnk you for inviting me , love :) .

I hope you will understand after you read everything

I wrote to let you know how much you mean to me . I have so many things to share with you . I love you , I truly and really care . My love for you is deeper than any ocean and it is greater than any need in your heart . If you’d only realize how much I love and care . This is how I truly feel . I miss the way things used to be , when we talked every night just getting to know one another. You made me feel whole inside . When I go to sleep, I dream you are right next to me . No matter , how much you upset me . I even love you when you make me go crazy with your ridiculous talk . Yet , I wish I could be with you every day in my life . I love the way you try to make things better for us, when it is the worst end of ties together . I don’t even want to begin to imagine life if you were not by my side . I wonder how we get so close in such a little time . I realized that I would love to spend my whole life with you . I felt that I am the luckiest person in the world now :) .

Burn a Koran Day ?

The Koran is in the hearts and minds of one-and-a-half billion people . Insulting the Koran is an insult to nations . Well , Jones Rethinks Plan For Koran Bonfire again . I have no idea what the pastor's motive is . But I'm sure he's under tremendous pressure right now to call off his planned event . Do you think he'd be angry if the Bible was burned in anger ? This is a tough issue . Trust me .

You dont get it ,do you ?

He’s going to frustrate you . Hell , he’s going to annoy the hell out of you . He’s going to contradict everything you say . He’s going to prove you wrong . He’s going to always want to be right . But he’s going to make you laugh and smile . He’s going to make you second guess things . He’s going to take care of you when you’re sick . He’s going to drive when it’s 3 in the morning to your house when your cat dies and let you cry in his arms and he’s going to just whisper that things will be alright into your hair . He will trace hearts into your back as he lies with you in bed. He will kiss you with such happiness and passion , even when he’s angry. He won’t be perfect. But Fuck , he will mess up every damn day of his life . He will break things , he will break your heart a time or two. He will forget your anniversary and what day you two first fell in love or your dogs birthday , I don’t fucking know . But he will make up for it . He will hold your hair back when you are throwing up , despite how disgusted he is. He will put up with your sarcasm and you will put up with his sexist jokes . He will make fun of the way you laugh yet secretly love it . The most beautiful thing between the two of you will be , I swear on my life and all that is holy , that you complete one another. That’s all .

I have something special for you :)

I just bought a new wallet for sayang . Thnk you , Beverly Hills Polo Club :) . Sayang , I hope you like it :) .

Never assume.

6 September 2010 . Another night to remember with sayang . I really had a great time with sayang eventho I buat perangai . Yeahh , I screwed up everything . but now I'm pretty fine :) . I mean , we are fine . Break fast at chilis with sayang , Fish & chip for me and BBQ Beef ribs & chicken for sayang . Not forget for our dessert , Chocolate brownie sundae . wuuuu :) . Sayang , picked me up at 1.30 and straight away went to KLCC . Really fucked up with KLCC parking . Went to levis , sayang bought a new jean . After that , we straight away to cinema . Bought movie ticket . We watched Grown ups XD . BUT before that I really wanted to watched Step up 3 :( but Sayang said " Grown ups best " . So , I'm fine with it . Well , about the movie absolutely the funniest movies I have seen in a long time , hearty laughing enough . I must admit it was a great movie . I particularly thought Adam Sandler did a great job :) . After done with our movie , sayang went " to see Allah " :) . I forgot to bring my telekung . It's 5.30pm already , went to chilis and we need to Q until 6 . Haihh , I saw Dora with fauzan :DD . hehehe , they look so sweet . After done with our dinner , we went to Topman and as usual sayang still bought a new clothes . I mean , A LOT ! By the way , I really had a blast night with you sayang . Ramadhan has 1 day left . Thats mean . . . SELAMAT HARI RAYA BLOGGER :) . To Malaysian whos going back to your hometown, please be extra careful when driving back and don’t forget to lock your house before leaving .This year I’m not going back to KEDAH :( . Pity me guys . Anyway , this opportunity I would like to seek for apologies and again wishing all of you happy and joyfull Eid ul-Fitr :) . Salam Lebaran from me & Family . I love you blogger . BOI .

Something you have to forgive yourself for.

I want to , forgive myself for the people that I have tried to push away from my life so many times . The people that , although made an effort to be there for me, was dejected by my own selfish and stubborn attitude . I want to say , I'm sorry . To my family , to my friends , to all the people I have ever met in my life , to Allah . You are the ones that have been with me since the beginning and I could honestly say that you give me hope . Your resilience and perseverance in making my day better have given me inspiration to try my best as well . I want to learn from you . Now, I don’t want to push you away , but bring you back in .

What the hell are you looking at ? I'm fucking done with your fucking attitude . I can be Sweet and nice but I have my limit girl ! but THAT WAS ENOUGH ! Whats your problem , woman ! Cant you see that I'm happy with irsyad ? Are you blind ? OR WHAT ! What I am is what I do best! Like if you want , Answer ! This ain't no test . If you like me , So thats " Great ," then we are friends . If you hate me , So don't make me get upset ! If you don't like what you see , then get the Hell out of here ! , So please understand ! Even if you don't "Who really gives a damn?" You act like I’m nothing . You talk about me behind my back . You spread rumors about me . No one would ever suspect it . No one would ever think about it and that's why you don't either .

I don't know if I continue , even today , always liking myself . But what I learned to do many years ago was to forgive myself . It is very important for every human being to forgive herself or himself because if you live , you will make mistakes - it is inevitable . But once you do and you see the mistake , then you forgive yourself and say , 'well, if I'd known better I'd have done better,' that's all . So you say to people who you think you may have injured , 'I'm sorry,' and then you say to yourself , 'I'm sorry.' If we all hold on to the mistake , we can't see our own glory in the mirror because we have the mistake between our faces and the mirror , we can't see what we're capable of being . You can ask forgiveness of others , but in the end the real forgiveness is in one's own self . I think that young men and women are so caught by the way they see themselves . Now mind you . When a larger society sees them as unattractive , as threats , as too black or too white or too poor or too fat or too thin or too sexual or too asexual , that's rough. But you can overcome that . The real difficulty is to overcome how you think about yourself. If we don't have that we never grow , we never learn, and sure as hell we should never teach .

Tupai is the Malay word for squirrel :) .

I just got my new cell phone but I want to switch all the stuff from my old one to my new one like photos music and contact . However I cant just switch Sim Cards -.- . How ? Anyone please ? Yesterday , 21 August 2010 . Breaking Fast with 5 amanah and Puan Rozita at Restaurant Tupai Tupai BUT I prefer to say " SUGAR GLIDER RESTAURANT " . HEHEHE . Had a great time with them . Should I comment about the place or food ? Mayb Both :) . The place just like a unique Malaya house and serving Malay cuisine but no steamboat yesterday -.- . Decorated restaurant definitely a place to relax and hang around while enjoying the food . So I think , yesterday buffet Ramadhan was Okay .

This is endless.

I swear I miss you more and more every single day. I used to think that you and I were going to make it through anything, and now I know that is the farthest thing from true. You’re with her now, and it kills me to see you two so fucking happy. I hate how you love her now. I want to be that for you, so much.I hoped that this summer I could’ve prove to you that I would honestly always be there in friendship, and more than that if you wanted it. I succeeded in being your friend, but I think we’ve realized that I will never be anything more again. I wish it wasn’t like that.I don’t want you to ever forget me, because I know I won’t forget you. I still wish for everything we had, and that it could be the way it was, even though I know that will never happen. For once, please hear me out, and listen to the words I am saying to you. You are the most important thing in this world to me.I know I deserve better… but I don’t want anyone else.

- From : Tumblr :) -

Prom Night

Any idea where to buy a very eye-catching prom dress , I prefer it in LONG and satin material , something look classy yet not that tremendously . I can guarantee that I only wear this dress only once for a dinner prom . HEHE . BUT my lovely mother says I'm old-fashioned . Obviously , as her daughter , I think she's the old . hahaha , Joking :) . Begin your search for your prom dress early .

SBU + VI Prom Night . I'm going both :DD .

R O J A K :)

Alhamdulilah , Hari ini hari yang ketiga berpuasa di bulan ramadhan :) . Semuanya berjalan dengan lancar , and blm lagi dapat cuti drpd ALLAH . Jadi , alhamdulilah lah . Semalam , jumpa sayang kejap . lepas Kelas tmbhan account , sayang amik kat sekolah and terus balik rumah . Sayang naik kejap utk jumpa dgn ayah . Then dia terus balik -________- . Tak apa , Sekurang kurangnya dapat jumpa dia juga drpd tak dpt . Hari ni dah hari jumaat , kalau tak silap lagi 102 hari untuk SPM :O . Hari ini , P&P pun tak ada lah stress sangat . Pagi tadi belajar account , sebab account je lagi 2 bab tak habis . yang lain Alhamdulilah dah habis . and minggu depan terus ada bengkel . Lepas account tadi , ERT . Tapi ERT cikgu tak ada . So , duduk dlm kelas and buat kerja sendiri . Lepas tu ada Bengkel Sejarah kat bilik pameran lepas tu balik :) . Insyallah , kalau tak ada pape halangan , ahad ini pergi UM ada Seminar Sejarah juga . Kalau boleh nak ajak sayang sekali . tapi nampaknya dia tak boleh , sebab dia balik kampung . Jadi , tak boleh nk buat apa lah . Isnin ni pula :) . HEHEHEHE , Happy Birthday Munie :D !

I'm missing you and It's killing me .

I may not get to see you as often as I like . I may not get to hold you in my arms all through the night . But deep in my heart I truly know, you are the one that I love , and I can't let you go . Distance never separates two hearts that really care , for our memories span the miles and in seconds we are there . But whenever I start feeling sad , because I miss you , I remind myself how lucky I am to have someone so special to miss . Missing you gets easier everyday because even though I'm one day further from the last time I saw you , I'm just one day closer to the next time I will see you again . Whatever it takes , you know I will be right here , right here , always waiting for you . If ever there is tomorrow when we are not together . There is something you must always remember. . . you are braver than you believe , stronger than you seem , and smarter than you think . But the most important thing is , even if we are apart , I will always be with you . Just remember the distance between our hearts is not an obstacle rather a great reminder of just how strong true love can be . Sometimes I think to myself how you happen to make me smile after all you have put me through .

All I need is you needing me.

I don’t honestly know who to put half of this into words , but I will string it
together as best as possible . It’s like you don’t care anymore, sometimes like you never did . I want to scream at you and tell you everything I have ever held back from saying but where would it really get me . You’d pretend I never said it , you’d pretend that was I was wrong and that it was all just lies . The truth is , you make me feel like I’m the biggest piece of filth you’ve ever seen . Like I’m constantly in the way and that I was never wanted . You make me feel like no one could ever love me and that I don’t deserve anything in life . You undermine me and take everything out on me . You blame me for things that no human could preven t. You pressure me to be perfect and make me feel like the biggest disappointment you have ever seen . You don’t ever comfort me in the slighest . You make me feel as though you are ashamed to even know me . I don’t know how much longer I can do this . I tried .

Preparation for Ramadhan .

Alhamdulillah the month of Ramadhan has dawned upon us once again . It should be remembered that what we practice is what we will take into the month of Ramdhan . I miss when Dinner table is filled with interesting food such as cakes , desserts , sweet drinks and home-cooked , Something that cannot be seen during normal day . During a month old Ramadhan will be the setting-up of hundreds of stalls everywhere selling all kinds of foods . This is the main reason why I cant wait for Ramadhan :) .

August .

6 - 7 August = Qiamullail at Seri bintang Utara .
7 August = Victoria Institution International Understanding Night & Installation 201
11 August = Happy Fasting Month ( Muslims )
16 August = Happy Birthday Munie :)

August Already ,

Saturday , 31 July .
Woke up & got ready while waiting for sayang to fetch us . Sayang reached around 11.45 and straight away went to pavilion . It was shitloads of fun cause we got to talk a lot & watched movie . We watched Eclipse :) . I cared about the characters . The movie had heart like so much T_T . Rosalie’s back story was perfectly played out . Edward you are cute but not cuter than Jacob :D . Deal with it . The next movie I cant wait better be the best I ever had . I can not wait for Breaking Dawn to come out I just buzzing about it and it better ends here . But Before we watched movie , We had a lunch at Food court with Mom , Alang , Ahbie , Riel and nurul . Our movie at 2.40 and finished at 4.50 almost 5 thereeee . Called mom , and met her at second floor . It was nice catching up :) . and then Starbucks . Then went home . No I mean , before that We went to jusco maluri . Went home and there was nothing to eat :S . BUT , I really had a great time with my family & sayang :) . Today , I woke up at 11.30 am . Watched TV while texting sayang .

About him .

The only person to put up with my emotions , not get sick of seeing my face almost everyday , go on random day trips with me cause no one else wanted to/could go , keep me company when I’m alone , pick up my phone calls during and time of the day or night , would buy me anything in the world if it just cheer me up a little bit , stay on the phone with me when I have a lonely , late drive back home , keep me in check when i cant , help me with my chores , always there to tell me its gonna be “okay” , never cause drama for me or my friends , be there when everyone else has left , wants to know that I'm safe , never be controlling , never be jealous , has dreams and goals he wants to pursue , not lazy at all , buy me snacks just because he knew they were my favorite , be with me when everyone else treats me like nothing , waits for me to be done with class just see me for two minutes , will run errands with me even if they have nothing to do with him , doesnt like to waste precious time fighting so we make up instantly , tell me he misses me even though its been a day , play video games with me and NOT let me win lol , watch all the girly shows with me , tell me “no” if I really need someone to , thinks I'm still pretty even if I look blah, likes to sit on the same side with me at restaurants even though I think its cheesy haha , can really keep a secret , is very family oriented , stay faithful to me , be completely honest with me , act goofy with me , be my highschool sweetheart , stay with me and still going , the guy who deserves every love song to be dedicated to him & who will always have my heart <3>

BBY , NAK YANG INI T_T . MY GOD ! BOLEH MATI .
and this !

we can change the world . trust me .

Laugh when you can , apologize when you should . Know that grudges are a waste of happiness . Let go of what you cannot change . Love deeply , forgive quickly , take some chances . Give all you have got . Always try to take things in your stride and smile when you are feeling sad. Remember what you have got but also love and cherish what you have now . Give all that you have , because life is too short to be anything else but happy . I don’t know why are you the only exception . I don’t know what’s holding me back from moving on . It’s not you , because you never fight for me anymore. So I guess it’s those good and bad memories . Or those times where you cried or tell me “baby I love you " .

2008 - 2010

COMPLETE , 4 of us . First off , I wish to say that I have made new friends , Although none I could call a best friend . I still miss my three best friends , Nana , Dylla & Wiena . Yesterday , in the car I saw nana and I was like ' Eyhh nana ' . I story everything to irsyad . What happened to us . & suddenly everything , come back to me . Rindu ? Mestilah . Tak kan nak ikutkan ego and cakap tak . In the past , I have acted very irrationally , and when I was paranoid made accusations that weren't true . After we fought , We are not speaking any more . BUT now , Alhamdulilah :) . Looking back through the years ,I can't believe how long . We have been best friends , Through good times and bad . I remember how we use to always laugh so hard , that was so cool ! Hahahaha . I will miss you girls like so much . Somehow wish the days would go fast . Our friendship & Our moment will never die . i will try my hardest today not to cry . Anyway , thanks for reading this . I had to get this off my chest . BOI .

You know you’re crazy when you have dreams like this.

Sorry for not being around to blog much lately . Mama away to Macau for 4 days . and now we miss you so badly ma :( . Please come back ! Anyway , I'm not using Facebook anymore since Irsyad decided to deactivated his account :) . I just feel like SHOPPING lately . I don’t know where it came from . Well , today at school was interesting . We only have another 4 months to go for SPM . So good luck all the Form 5 , 2010 :) . Speaking of this Saturday . I do have a lot of activities planned for the weekends coming up so I’m looking forward to that . I wanted to go out with sayang . But somehow I dont think that we can make it . Rindu , Chaw kuey teow Pavilion like so much :( . Sayang , I cant wait for this Saturday . Rindu , time hangout dengan you . Dah lama tak pergi sana . At the same time , mama dah otw balik sini . By the way , I received some great news today , About my relationship betwen me & irsyad , PROM NIGHT SBU and " I dont need to be sad after this " :) . HEHEHE . & I'm out guys . Boi

I want to FEEL pretty.

Guys , you must know that if a girl loved you then , chances are she still loves you heaps now . She's probably crying herself to sleep every night over you while trying her hardest to keep on a happy face during the day . Most likely , she still thinks about you all the time , everyday . She probably still sits there imagining her future with you in it , then thinks back to the past and shatters . Whenever something happens to her , good or bad , she's most likely thinking of you and wishing that she could tell you all about it . Whenever she hears a song on the radio she'll think of you , not only because the song reminds her of you but also how much of her broken life right now can relate to the song . Whenever she watches a romantic movie or sees a cute couple , hand in hand , she starts to die a little more inside knowing that what used to be is now just a memory . Whenever she thinks of you , she smiles , yet at the same time , she is suffering . Although she may not show it , she is suffering a great deal of pain . She's suffering from remembering those happy moments that she'll always remember but it seemed that you've already forgotten . She's afraid that you might forget her along the way as well . On the outside , she may seem like all smiles and laughter , but what is behind the mask is someone who knows really well how to hide themselves . You have no idea just how much pain she is suffering . She still hurts, because the memories of you and her are not only too hard to forget , she also doesn't want to forget , though sometimes she tries to forget , everything just somehow reminds her of you all over again . She re-reads your old texts and convos because she misses you and what used to be . she misses your hugs , she misses your smiles . She misses you entirely . She loves you . She fell for you , and you just watched her fall . Seriously , if you didn't intend to catch her , then don't lead her on , don't get her hopes up , cause the harder harder she falls for you , the more pain she'll end up having to go through afterwards . Don't tell her you love her if you don't mean it , chances are, she might do something crazy like believe it . For the guys reading this, know that no matter how strong a girl may look on the outside , we all go through some sort of pain on the inside when you leave us. And for the girls reading this, there must've been one boy in particular that was on your mind the whole entire time .

Twenty Again :)

At times the days seemed so long , I thought I'd never make it through . . . Then suddenly , out of a dream I have met someone like you :) . Happy Anniversary 4 Months sweetheart . You have changed my world . I dare not leave your side . If i did , I would surely cry . I hope that you never leave b . We are perfect for each other . " I would never love another " . I like everything about you :) . Dont changed anything ! I feel like I can be myself when I'm with you . Thank you for the good times sweetheart :) . I could speak of a thousand promises or even bet my very soul the rest of my life , I will be touched with a feeling no one can control . and I really hope one day you see how much you really mean to me . Nothing will ever come between us . No matter what anybody says or does , you will always be in my heart . & No matter how much we fight , Things will be Okay :) . Like I said I will love u forever , no matter what .

& Yet , everyone is still taking the risks .

This is life . People will screw you over . You will fight with your family . You will witness things that will change you forever . You will blame new lovers for things old lovers did . You will lose best friends you thought would always be there . You will come to realize that everyone has a past . You will cry , you will laugh , and you will embarrass yourself . But then , you will find your very own moment where none of that matters , where you can sit back and realize that shit happens to the people who can handle it and that this is who you are , and that no one should want to change you , including yourself .

Yesterday , 18 July 2010 . Irsyad come over to my house and fetch me . Went to Jusco Maluri , pick up Hareesa and straight went to Salak Selatan , Farah's :) . Fetch , Zain at LRT Salak Selatan . We reached at Farah house around 12.45 . After that , Send hareesa at SHELL bandar tasik selatan . Boooi reesa :PP . " and now Just me and you b , Inside the car :DD " . We can so manja manja without people around us . hahaha . Went back home after that . Sayang LAPAR ! and we decided to order pizza :) . Mommy belanja . Kayhh , We SAFE b :) . hahaha , around 4.30 went to hospital and go back home after that . Getting Ready for camp fire . At , 6 we went to Victoria Institution . The event was SO great :) . Good Job VI . Reached at home at 11.30pm . and I AM TIRE NOW B but I really had a great time with sayang , family and friends . SAYANG , boleh dukung lagi :) ? HEHEHE . No joke ! I malu sangat time you dukung I , sbb everyone mcm pandang kita . but dari situ I dapat rasa yang you sayangkan I sangat . You berani buat mcm tu , you tak kisah apa orang kata as long you nk smua orang tahu kat sana yang I ni you punya and you sayangkan I sangat . B thanks for the day and night . I love you so much B :( .

But I'm not stressin out :PP

Almost everyday I see you , cinta :) . Frankly Speaking , I never get bored . When I am with you , Nothing else seems to matter . Even though were far apart I still love you dearly with all my heart b .I have fallen in love with you and I will never let you go . I love you more than anyone , I just had to let you know . And if you ever wonder why , I don't know what I will say, but I will never stop loving you , each and every day . There's no limit to what I wouldn't do for you . Just ask , it will be done , no matter the miles , no matter the sacrifice . I want to let you know that my heart stays with you tight , so that my warmth will make you feel that everything's going to be right :) .

I love you unconditionally , with everything I am and more than anyone ever thought possible syad<3

Results for CHEER 2010

1. Cyrens 281.5 + 273.0 = 554.5

2. Blitzers 254.0 + 263.0 = 517.0

3. Dynamitez 266.5 + 250.5 = 517.0

4. Stompers 254.0 + 262.5 = 516.5

5. D*Starz 242.0 + 262.5 = 504.5

6. Titans 240.0 + 247 = 487.0

7. Zodiac Boys 229.0 + 248 = 477.0

8. Shirtliff 215.0 + 241.5 = 456.5

9. Zodiac Girls 214.0 + 226 = 440.0

10. Vulcanz Boys 217.0 + 223 = 440.0

11. Vivacious 191.5 + 244 = 435.5

12. Calyx Girls 206.0 + 227.5 = 433.5

13. Mickeymitez 205.5 + 212 = 417.5

14. Vulcanz Girls 190.0 + 212 = 402.0

15. Muriel 191.0 + 200 = 391.0

16. Titans Jr 179.0 + 203 = 382.0

17. Pirates Boys 176.5 + 183.5 = 360.0

18. Calyx Boys 164.0 + 194 = 358.0

19. Vipers 145.0 + 192.5 = 337.5

20. Vibrant 145.5 + 163 = 308.5

21. Dazzle 151.0 + 155 = 306.0

22. Anchorz

23. Ignite

24. Pandora

25. Adele

26. Falcons

27. Pirates Girls

28. Hurricanes

29. Vixens

30. Gemz

31. Electric

32. Evogue

33. Vaccinez

34. Zeus

35. Inferno

Like seriously , If SHIRTLIFF on first day tak buat silap . mmg top 5 .

Our journey has ended , It's time to start a new .

We're back to Attack , Will show No slack . Prepared ! To fight ! with all our might . Black yellow and white . . . Shirtliff non stop . Yeahhh :) ! Good Job SHIRTLIFF . You girls still the best . Cheerleading is over and now back to study Munie . Another 4 months to go T_T . & Trial this September . My godddd ! I had a great time with SHIRTLIFF , and now I'm miss them :( . Especially Sherin , Fatyn , alysha , alya , adila & abby . Not forget to aunty lyna and aiman . I missed that " today " . Remember the times we had together ? The jokes , The whimpers The laughter , The heartaches , The fun , The parties and The Cheerleaders . " Old friedns never fade , girls " . SHIRTLIFF , I love you :) . Dont give up .

Truthfully .

We are teenagers . We are still learning . Shitt happens . We cheat , we lie , we criticise , we fight over stupid things . We fall in love and end up getting hurt . We bitch , bitch , BITCH . We bitch about bitches being bitches .We party till dawn , we drink till we pass out . We hate people for no reason , we call each other names . We stay up late having deep conversations , or stay up late just to THINK . We go out and have a kick ass time with your friends and THOSE WILL BE THE MEMORIES . One day that's going to all pass . You can waste your time focusing on all the bad things , but one day you are gonna wish you were still a teenager . So make the most of what you have now , forget all the bullsheett and drama and LIVE YOUR FUCKING LIFE WITH A SEXY SMILE ON YOUR FACE :) . and pretty girls need no make up , fancy flashy clothes to get attention , no lipstick to catch a smile , no dyed hair to make a statement , no skimpy clothes to get guys , and definitely not a bad mouth & bratty attitude . Simple yet . . . Stunning :) . Thank you .

injured .

What should I do now . I only have a week before the competition and it's no where near better . There is nothing I can do to make it " better " :( . Useless . Missing my cartwheel and a round off now :( . I still wanna be in cheer , MAN ! I dont want to give it up because I love cheer so much . I love cheerleading because I love cheering . My teammates are some of my best friends . In a game or in life , I'm always looking on the bright side of things . Well , You don't just dance around . It's much harder than it looks , if you mess up as a flyer , base , backspotter even frontspotter you have to run laps or do push ups ! Tumbling takes so much hard work and effort . It's changed my life for sure . All that I have learned from cheerleading so far in my life is that if you want to achieve something try hard for it and don't give up not everything is going to come naturally . Any young girl who wants to cheer I say go for it. It is a very fun sport to do and you won't regret it ! Like seriously girls .

Together we work , together we fall . We work as a team - SHIRTLIFF -